Earlier this week, NPR had another bleak, the-world-is-sooooooo-fucked-up-for-young-people article about how millennials aren’t buying houses like previous generations (forwarded by Andrew Brown, yr an adult’s moral conscience). They explain this trend by rehashing all the other bad news millennials are faced with; there aren’t any jobs, credit is impossible, real estate is either prohibitively expensive or in regions with no economic prospects. Also, since millennials are sooooooo entitled and want the freedom to pick up and move whenever they feel like, they’re not even thinking about owning their own home. It’s depressing news, which is why I felt compelled to look on the bright side, to help you, dear reader, to consider it a blessing that you’ll probably never be able to afford you’re own home. Below is a list of reasons why you shouldn’t bother owning a home, because it mostly sucks. Don’t say I never made you feel better. .
1.) Owning a house is, like, a job in itself. Every Sunday is another trip to Loews for new fixtures or appliances. If you live in an apartment and you have a shitty kitchen, you just have a shitty kitchen. And your life is pretty much the same as it would be after you could have spent $50,0000 and 700 hours making your kitchen awesome. Think about it. What do you want to do this weekend? Watch Prometheus, go get drunk in the park, watch Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Final and play ‘Cards Against Humanity’? Or do you want to get in an argument with your girlfriend/boyfriend in the drapery section of Home Depot?