Anyone on the west coast, who has had to fly east, for a quick trip, is tempted by the redeye. You know it’s going to suck, that you’ll be uncomfortable, that you won’t get any sleep, that you’ll show up in New York or Boston or Dulles feeling like a zombie, and have to start your shitty, East Coast day. Your nose will be running, because you got sick on the flight. Your clothes will be rumpled, and the shower you took eight hours before will feel like it was days ago. It will take 2-3 days of over-caffeination for you to feel normal again, and then, you’ll probably have to fly right back home to the west coast.
After every redeye-powered trip, I swear I’ll never take another one. And then, invariably, I do, because I can’t stand the thought of losing a day. Which is stupid, because you wind up losing a day cumulatively due to your lack energy. Anyways, there are a few things you can do to lessen the impact of a redeye and ensure you have productive trip, without COMPLETELY feeling like a deranged-zombie-asshole.
- Get a lot of sleep the nights leading up to your flight. You know when people sleep an extra couple of hours to “catch up” on sleep? Well, that’s a thing. So, if you bank a couple extra hours the nights before the flight, you’ll need a little less the night of the flight.
- Do everything in your power to sleep. That means sleeping pills, earplugs, pillows, blankets, two sleepmasks! Don’t even consider turning on your inflight TV, or pulling out your kindle or waiting for the flight staff to bring you a juice. From the moment the wheels come up, try to fucking sleep. Sleeping pills, if that’s your thing, should also be a consideration.
- Make enough money to ride first class. Oh, that’s not really a possibility in your industry? Oh. Well, maybe spring the extra 60 bucks for the extra leg room. I know. It’s an angry stupid racket, but kind of worth it.
- Don’t eat too much junk food before and after. A steady diet of fruits and veggies will help keep you at an even keel.
IF you do all this, you might not feel SOOOO terrible, but you probably will anyways, because redeyes always suck. How about next time, you book the earliest morning flight, and pay for the in-air wifi, so that way, you can get your work done, you get in the evening and can drop your stuff off, then go out to dinner with your friends/colleagues, and not feel like a total scumbag? That makes sense, right? Yeah, that’s what I thought, too.
Henry Goldman is founder of yr an adult. He knows, he’s working on it.
Photo credit flickr user: S baker, used under CC license.